"Sigurado ka na ba sa desisyon mo? You really want to get married?" Seth looked at me with dismay.
"Pag-isipan mo muna yan, Phoenix." Wayne patted me on the back.
"Let him do whatever he wants." Sabi naman ni Tristan.
"Cassie's pregnant with twins. Gusto kong lumaki ang mga anak ko na buo ang pamilya." Sabi ko bago ininom ang baso ng alak.
"And you got her pregnant? And you're going to have 2 kids?" Gulat na sabi ni Seth. "That's it. Game over ka na."
"Panahon na para mag settle down ako. I'm not getting any younger." Sabi ko at ininom ang hawak kong alak.
"You really love her, huh?" Si Wayne.
I nodded, reluctantly. Yes, I love Cassie. Walang dahilan para itago ko pa iyon. She's going to be my wife and the mother of my children. Just the thought of that made me smile. A pride bubbled in me that she had some part of me growing inside her body. I pity my friends. Hindi nila alam kung ano ang pakiramdam na dinadala ng babaeng mahal mo ang magiging anak niyo.
"Sa hinabahaba ng prosesyon sa simbahan din ang tuloy." Sabi ni Axel. We all laughed.
"Kelan ang stag party?" Tanong ni Seth.
"I don't want to have a stag party." Sabi ko.
"What? Hindi kami papayag niyan! Bilang na ang maliligayang araw mo. You have to enjoy it! Because soon, you'll be changing diapers." Natatawang sabi ni Seth.
"Ako na bahala dun." Wayne winked.
"Sana lalaki yung kambal mo para ma train na namin." Sabi ni Axel.
"Hell yeah, we'll be the best uncles ever." Ngumisi si Seth.
"They'll grow up to be a sexy beast like us. That's for sure. Hahabulin sila ng mga babae." Sabi ni Tristan.
"Shut up, guys. I'm not going to let you near my kids. You'll corrupt their innocent minds."
Inabot kami ng madaling-araw sa kuwentuhan at inuman. I drunk quite alot than I usually do. Napasarap ang kuwentuhan at hindi ko namalayan na marami na pala akong nainom. Nagpaalam na kami sa isa't isa at naghiwa-hiwalay na kami. I got in my car and drove to my house. I just tossed my clothes and went to bed. I'm so tired and drunk but I'm very happy. Napangiti ako. Hindi pa rin ako makapaniwalang pumayag na si Cassie na magpakasal sa akin. She's going to be mine... all mine.
"Tama na! Please, tama na! Maawa ka!" Nababalutan ng takot ang mukha ni Cassie. Tears were streaming down her face. My body continued to move on top of her. Gusto kong itigil yun pero hindi ko magawa. Parang iba ang kumkontrol sa katawan ko at nanonood lang ako mula sa loob nito. I wanted to scream, I wanted to stop it but I felt paralyzed. All I can do is watch her.
She punched and kicked and tried to get away. She kicked it in the stomach. Nakawala siya at gumapang palayo. There was dried blood smeared between her thighs. Nahablot siya nito sa paa at hinatak pabalik. She was still in crawling position. Hinawakan niya ang balakang ni Cassie at ibinaon ang sarili. Cassie screamed in pain.
"No! Nick, stop!" Sigaw niya. She buried her face on the ground. Nakakuyom ang mga palad niya. Hinila nito ang buhok niya para iangat ang ulo ni Cassie.
"Having fun, you cock hungry whore?" Bulong nito sa tenga niya. That voice... boses ko iyon. LEAVE CASSIE ALONE! I cried. Don't hurt her. Not my Cassie...
"Napakawalanghiya mo!" She said sobbing.
Tumawa ito na parang demonyo. He continued moving and Cassie stopped fighting. She was quietly crying. Nakasubsob ang mukha nito sa sahig. Wala akong magawa kung hindi ang umiyak habang pinanonood ko iyon.
Pagkaraan ng ilang sandali tumigil ito. Naghahabol ng hininga. Binitawan nito ang balakang ni Cassie at nahiga sa tabi. Cassie tried to stand but he quickly caught her again. Now she was on top of him. Umayos ito at umupo din. Cassie is sitting on his lap facing him. He opened her legs and put his body between. I could clearly see Cassie's face from there. Walang mababakas na kahit anong emosyon sa mukha nito. He entered her again. Her eyes started to water. Her nails dig on his shoulder. From pain her expression turned to anger.
"You disgust me!" Sabi ni Cassie at dinuraan ito sa mukha. He harshly wiped it off his face. He grabbed a handful of her hair on the back of her head. Dahilan para mapatingala ito. Impit itong umungol sa sakit. He licked from the bottom of her neck and up. Then he kissed her harshly.
Nagising ako na hingal na hingal. I was sweating like hell. Nakabukas naman ang aircon. Fuck! What was that all about? Sinuklay ko ang mga daliri ko sa buhok ko. I was raping Cassie in my dream. I quickly grabbed my phone and dialed Cassie's number. I can almost hear my heart beat while her phone is ringing. Tangina! Bakit ang tagal niyang sumagot? Kung anu-ano tuloy ang pumapasok sa isip ko. The dream was so vivid. Parang totoong totoo ito.
"Nick?" Finally! Halatang bagong gising ang boses nito.
"Cassie!" Sabi ko. I sighed with relief.
"It's four in the morning. Bakit tumawag ka?" Tanong nito.
"I'm sorry. I just... I had a bad dream. Hindi ako mapapalagay hangga't hindi kita nakakausap. I just want to make sure you're alright." Sabi ko.
"I'm ok, Nick." Sabi nito.
"Sorry. This is silly. Matulog ka na ulit. I'll see you later." Sabi ko.
Pagkapasok ko pa lang ng opisina yakap na agad ni Nick ang sumalubong sa akin. He hugged me so tight.
"What's wrong?" Tanong ko ng makawala sa pagkayap niya. He looked like he hadn't slept. Malaki ang eye bag nito sa ilalim ng mata.
"Cassie, I won't let anyone hurt you." He kissed me on the lips.
"Was it about the dream?" Naalala ko na tinawagan niya ako kaninang umaga.
"Yes." Sagot niya.
"Panaginip lang yun ano ka ba! Huminahon ka nga." Sabi ko.
"Para kasing totoong-totoo." He said anxiously.
"Ano ba kasing napaginipan mo at nagkakaganyan ka?"
"I dreamt I was... someone was raping you. And I couldn't do anything about it. Wala akong magawa kung hindi panoorin ka." His voice broke.
I paused. He doesn't remember what happened that night seven years ago. I have forgiven him. Gusto ko na ibaon sa limot iyon. I want to pretend that never happened. He wasn't in his right mind that night.
"It... it's just a dream." It wasn't a dream. It happened. But I want to pretend it never did. Wala rin naman magandang maidudulot kung sakaling sabihin ko sa kanya na totoong nangyari iyon. I will only open a can of worms.